So...here we begin.
I've never done a blog before; hopefully this will be a good experience for us all (and by us all, I mean whoever reads this...which, in my case, could be just one person: moi. Oh well). I'd like to offer a private warning to the reader though: I like to use smiley faces [e.g. :) ] a lot, and I'm also a fan of current, hip lingo - the word I will most likely use is 'whatevs'. For those who might not be aware of that particular word's meaning: 'Whatevs' is equivalent to 'whatever'.
You're welcome :)
I am the kind of guy who enjoys to ramble (You'll hopefully notice that the word 'ramble' is cleverly hidden in the web address of this here blog). Get me started on a subject I love to talk about, and I'll ramble for hours. A prime example of that: Books. From lengthy tomes to 'Far Side' comic collections, I am an avid fan of books. They are able to transport you to otherworldly realms; they're able to welcome you into their pages with a familiar warmth that only true friends and family can physically afford you; they're inviting and enticing and adventurous and romantic and mysterious and bizarre and so much more. Books are an escape and a journey, a pathway that can be revisited time and time again. Books are like coming home. Although I am a tremendous fan of fantasy and science fiction, the book that offers the greatest 'coming home' feeling, the greatest warmth, the greatest adventure, and the greatest joy is not one borne of the human mind. It is actually the Word of God - it is nonfiction, it is a historical work, it is a spiritual awakening.
Hopefully you're all aware by now that I'm a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (a.k.a. I'm a Mormon). I invite any and all to read this blog, and even more so I invite any and all to read the volume I have referenced above - The Book of Mormon: Another Testament of Jesus Christ. I do not want to force Mormonism 'down anyone's throat', nor do I wish to sound like some sort of religious zealot. I'm an ordinary person (maybe even sub-ordinary) that loves God and the words He's given us; I know that I hold common beliefs with Baptists, Methodists, Evangelicals - yes, and with Muslims, Jews, Hindus, and Buddhists as well - and I believe that if we would look to our commonalities instead of our differences we could certainly make this world a better place. I do not mean to turn you from whatever beliefs you now have; I mean to share my light with you, a light that has helped me through some pretty dark times.
Recently my family suffered the terrible loss of a loved one. For those of you who know the pain that death brings to a family or to friends, you will likely sympathize and understand the immense amount of anguish that my soul underwent in the first few hours and days following this loss. I did suffer from the guilt that many endure - the pain of 'Why?' and 'What if...' - but more than that I felt the absolute horror of realizing that, in this life, I'd never see my loved one again.
I crawled into my closet, shut the door, and screamed. My throat burned from the physical pain, but that was nothing compared to the weight of sorrow in my heart. "Just bring him back!" I cried. "I just want to see him one more time! I know You can do it! Just bring him back! Please..."
There were ebbs and flows in my breakdown that night. There were moments of quiet, when I could no longer cry the tears I wanted to; then there were the moments of noise, when I sobbed and screamed and petitioned God to please bring back the loved one now gone from our midst. I received no voice from the heavens, nor did a sudden memory of a scripture flare into my mind - it was just me in that closet, sobbing into a pillow, my hands clenched into fists of...well, I guess a mixture of rage and pain.
Over the time that has passed betwixt that moment and this post, I've had time to reflect on what was the hardest of my mortal experiences thus far. It has become the near-constant focus of almost all of my thought and concentration; it was very present in my mind when I attended a religion class. Throughout the class we studied several chapters in the Book of Alma, with a particular emphasis on the 32nd chapter. Several themes throughout this portion of the book are humility and faith. As noted in the title of this post, I want to pay close attention to the sixth verse of this chapter:
"[Alma, the prophet of God] beheld that [the people's] afflictions had truly humbled them, and that they were in a preparation to hear the word" (Alma 32:6; emphasis added).
The Lord often tells us in various areas of scripture - for my purposes I'll state the Old and New Testaments in addition to The Book of Mormon and the Doctrine and Covenants, although I'm sure that He does the same thing throughout other religious texts as well - that our faith is meant to be tried, and that sometimes this life is just gonna hurt.
But it is in our hurting that we must make a choice. As stated in the Book of Mormon:
"But behold, because of the exceedingly great length of the war...many had become hardened, because of the exceedingly great length of the war; and many were softened because of their afflictions, insomuch that they did humble themselves before God, even in the depth of humility" (Alma 62:41).
We can either harden our hearts in our afflictions, or we can do something that exerts even more courage and tenacity: We can become humble. Now, don't get me wrong, I'm NOT a perfect example of humility - far from it! - but the loss I've felt is definitely something that has humbled me and that has forced me to make a choice: Sam, you can either hate God, or you can love Him even more.
I chose the latter. My life is still far from perfect, and I still make mistakes every single day - but I'm not going to let that stop me from being calmed by the light of love that our eternal Heavenly Father extends to each of us. I've decided that I want this experience to humble me and bring me closer to God.
I'm also currently studying Biblical Hebrew, and we learned in one of our many classes that one of the Hebrew verbs meaning to hear actually means even more than that. The particular verb implies hearing what's been said/commanded...and then acting on it. So when we read in Alma 32:6 that the people "were in a preparation to hear the word", we can understand that their afflictions and their heartaches and trials and tribulations and sufferings had brought them to the same choice that I was forced to make, a choice that we all, in one way or another, will be forced to make.
Choose humility. Choose allowing yourself to be broken down - that's the only way God can build you back up again.
That being said, I want to reiterate it: When we're broken down is the best time for God to build us back up again, better, stronger, greater. In Isaiah 40:29-31 (KJV), we read:
"[God] giveth power to the faint; and to them that have no might he increaseth strength.
"Even the youths shall faint and be weary, and the young men shall utterly fall:
"But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint."
I invite each and every one of us - myself included - to allow the Lord's redeeming love to build us back up when we are broken down by the hard things of this world. I invite each and every one of us to choose His light and His love over our fears and frailties. I invite each and every one of us to choose to be humble and to accept that God knows all things, that our trials are part of His plan, and that He will make us stronger and greater than we could ever make ourselves. I have experienced this, I am experiencing it now, and I hope that I will continue to experience it for the rest of my life.
May God be with you till we meet again, my friends.
Sam
"[Alma, the prophet of God] beheld that [the people's] afflictions had truly humbled them, and that they were in a preparation to hear the word" (Alma 32:6; emphasis added).
The Lord often tells us in various areas of scripture - for my purposes I'll state the Old and New Testaments in addition to The Book of Mormon and the Doctrine and Covenants, although I'm sure that He does the same thing throughout other religious texts as well - that our faith is meant to be tried, and that sometimes this life is just gonna hurt.
But it is in our hurting that we must make a choice. As stated in the Book of Mormon:
"But behold, because of the exceedingly great length of the war...many had become hardened, because of the exceedingly great length of the war; and many were softened because of their afflictions, insomuch that they did humble themselves before God, even in the depth of humility" (Alma 62:41).
We can either harden our hearts in our afflictions, or we can do something that exerts even more courage and tenacity: We can become humble. Now, don't get me wrong, I'm NOT a perfect example of humility - far from it! - but the loss I've felt is definitely something that has humbled me and that has forced me to make a choice: Sam, you can either hate God, or you can love Him even more.
I chose the latter. My life is still far from perfect, and I still make mistakes every single day - but I'm not going to let that stop me from being calmed by the light of love that our eternal Heavenly Father extends to each of us. I've decided that I want this experience to humble me and bring me closer to God.
I'm also currently studying Biblical Hebrew, and we learned in one of our many classes that one of the Hebrew verbs meaning to hear actually means even more than that. The particular verb implies hearing what's been said/commanded...and then acting on it. So when we read in Alma 32:6 that the people "were in a preparation to hear the word", we can understand that their afflictions and their heartaches and trials and tribulations and sufferings had brought them to the same choice that I was forced to make, a choice that we all, in one way or another, will be forced to make.
Choose humility. Choose allowing yourself to be broken down - that's the only way God can build you back up again.
That being said, I want to reiterate it: When we're broken down is the best time for God to build us back up again, better, stronger, greater. In Isaiah 40:29-31 (KJV), we read:
"[God] giveth power to the faint; and to them that have no might he increaseth strength.
"Even the youths shall faint and be weary, and the young men shall utterly fall:
"But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint."
I invite each and every one of us - myself included - to allow the Lord's redeeming love to build us back up when we are broken down by the hard things of this world. I invite each and every one of us to choose His light and His love over our fears and frailties. I invite each and every one of us to choose to be humble and to accept that God knows all things, that our trials are part of His plan, and that He will make us stronger and greater than we could ever make ourselves. I have experienced this, I am experiencing it now, and I hope that I will continue to experience it for the rest of my life.
May God be with you till we meet again, my friends.
Sam
God Bless you sweet Sam...
ReplyDelete